Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Luck – My Review and some notes about bollywood movies


It’s in Bollywood’s blood to make 1 good movie out of 15. And this definitely is not the one.

The film Luck is all about luck, obviously. The story is based on gambling on Humans and their luck. Karim Moosa (Sanjay Dutt, I wonder how they found this character name for him!) plays a perfect Ajith of Billa by making terrible walk in every scene he would appear. He finds people who always are lucky in life and puts them on the game to fight for their lives. We see a gambling arena (that resembles a stock market) with men betting on every person. The single lucky person who stays alive at the end earns Rs 20 crores.

The star cast could be the triggering point for a tired man in office to get out and watch this movie, but I am sure he would return unhappy and more tired than he already was. Imran khan, shruti haasan, ravi kishan, mithun and chitrashee rawat are all part of the stupid game, trying to make money. Despite the fact that there was absolutely no scope for acting in any of these roles, Chitrashee and ravi kishan did a brilliant job. On the other hand, the seriously beautiful daughter of an impeccable actor, was hopeless in the movie. Someone really needs to teach Shruti Haasan what acting is all about and I am surprised Kamal didn’t have time for that.

Here’s how the audience’s luck turned out when I saw this movie in Woodland’s Main theatre.

1. Guys was extremely lucky to see Shuti Haasan in Bikini.. :D

2. Since the theatre hardly had audience, some couples got very lucky!

3. And some men found themselves in a very lucky position coz of the theatre they had chosen to watch this film. They moved to the next screen as soon as the saw Sanjay Dutt walking for the 17th time. Woodland’s symphony was playing Velu Prabhakarnin Kadhal kadhai!!!

The point that I really want to make is that bollywood movies are going nowhere. Kambakth Ishq was a terrible remake with akshay kumar scaring everybody out of the theatre. I can’t stand him even in the thumbs up ad. And because Pammal K Sambatham had no room for skin show with Simran playing a decent doctor, the bollywood remake had to make changes so that kareena could appear in bikini. She plays Doctor cum Model!!! How so stupid!! Shortkut, remake of Vellithirai, was another such disaster.

Bollywood directors, let me tell you, I can clearly understand that you all have taken classes from vijay on “how to remake movies”, and I hope you now realize that you lost money on the movies as well as on those classes. So please stop giving us your package of a terrible script, bad acting and irritating music. And skin shows... dudes, too much is too ugly and it cannot stand as a lone warrior in saving your movie.

Back to luck, if you are a fan of imran khan, go ahead and watch it for him but don’t expect to feel good at the end. If you love sanjay dutt, please avoid. This is one of his performances turned down.

*/5 – Poor....... but doesn’t deserve a zero.

Verdict: Sorry about your bad luck if you had seen this crap.

Saturday, June 20, 2009

All about Dumeel Doppu Engineering College

The 10 most irritating and funniest instances of Dumeel Doppu Engineering college


1. Director : “Last week Andhra CM called me and we had serious meeting for 3 hours”.

2. Director : “Please give me 50 invitations of your symposium. I have to give it to my close friends like N.Ram and Narayanamurthy”.

3. Senior giving a letter to the “gate” man after student returned his vehicle to him (which he used by mistake)
Senior: “sir, Here is the letter stating that ABC has given the bike to me safely and I have no issues. I have signed below”
“gate” man: “ok get signature from principal in that letter”

4. Director to lecturer in class: “you are not strict, ma’am. You are very loose”

5. When students were discussing about symposium in a classroom
Man from Attendance cell: “Thambi, ippadi sattam pota, thambi, apparam ellarum keppaanga thambi, apparam thambi, director thituvaaru thambi, apparam thambi, symposium cancel thambi.

6. Once upon a time, there was an ID collector in the college.
ID collector to student: “why didn’t you attend the special class after college yesterday?”
Student: “sir, I was absent yesterday”
ID Collector: “So what. Y didn’t you attend the special class?”

7. Students: “Director sir, we have been rejected by TCS but we did our interview very well. Can you please ask the HR for what reason they have rejected us?”
Director: “See ma, I cannot talk to small HR. I am a man who should talk to Ratan Tata”

8. Director talking about diwali
“I don’t like diwali at all. You make money out of paper and you all save it. You make tapas out of same paper and you destroy it.”

9. Lunch time is between 1 pm to 2 pm
At 1:35, student goes to canteen counter
Student: “One veg puff”
Lady at the counter: “no pa, token will not be issued after 1:30 pm”
Student: “But lunch time is from 1 to 2 pm”
Lady: “Director’s rule. Because you people are not going to class at 2 pm”

10. The inside information that a student got from one of the lecturers when in first year.
Director at meeting
“Even small college like SASTRA has got 5 star rating. Our BIG college has not got it yet. It is all policits”


Top 5 outrageously unacceptable attributes of Dumeel Doppu

5. When students met director after a part of the ceiling fell on one of the students
Director: “ why are you creating so much matter for this silly matter”

4. Director addressing the students – “The study material prepared by the college has very high quality and standard”

3. Board outside the lab – “Lab with 0% defect”

2. There is a board on wall near the accounts dept which says “Winners don’t do different things, they do things differently – Chairman of Dumeel Doppu Engg College”

1. Dumeel Doppu Engineering College has become Dumeel Doppu University

Monday, June 1, 2009

Thoranai - My Review


First of all, I would like to thank God for giving me a free ticket to this movie. I would have killed myself if I had paid Rs 100 for this nonsense. And God, I would be a very happy man if you could reimburse the money I spent on popcorn and coke as well. Having said that, you must have got an idea about how interesting the movie is and here is what it is all about.

The film is all about Murugan (vishal) who comes to Chennai in search of his long lost brother and gets entangled in problems with two famous thugs Guru and Tamilarasan (Prakash Raj) and in the process has romance with Indhu (shriya). I really don’t want to get into the details of the story as it makes no difference to the review, but one thing I should mention is the director has carefully preserved all the attributes of a “rowdy-good guy-related-action-film”. Let me give u a list of such attributes.

1. A pathetic high end introduction for hero. (but it doesn’t beat vijay’s kuruvi. Hero flying out of drainage)

2. Serious dialogues that can only make you laugh (or sometimes cry)

3. Absolutely no logic

4. Hero has friends who are comedians and heroine has friends who look sick.

5. Guy from village “corrects” software company girl.

6. Gorgeous heroine having absolutely no role in the story.

7. Average and unimpressive action sequences.

8. Hero going to minister’s house, rowdy’s house and probably even to white house, threatens to kill and comes out safe.

9. Stupid music

10. And hopeless lyrics

Thoranai has few more elements that makes the movie more nonsensical. Vishal’s overacting and dialogue deliver; hero’s brother saying to hero “hey if they know that you are my brother, they will kill you” after the hero trumpets the news to every enemy he has found; shriya kissing vishal without anybody seeing them outside her “software company” where people are walking in; and just because the movie’s name is thoranai, vishal shouting “thoranai thoranai thoranai” till everyone walks out of the theater while Prakash Raj does the job when vishal takes break.

The only aspect of the movie that is worth the ticket money (though I did not pay for the movie!) is Santhanam and his amazing comical dialogues. He was simply stunning in the movie.

½* / 5 – The half star is for Santhanam. If somebody could compile all his scenes from the movie and release a short film, I’ll watch it thrice!

Verdict: vomit

P.S: Shriya Saran, please marry me…

Saturday, February 28, 2009

Me, Myself and Inspiring Stories


Every student gets to hear inspiring stories of successful people. There aren’t one or two but so many successful people in this world and they all have their own stories. If you observe them closely, you’ll find a pattern they follow. Usually, the stories start from the successful man as a poor infant with only one of his parents alive. The story then moves to the child’s education where one of the two possible situations would come up. The child either pursues excellent education in dire economic conditions of his/her family (like studying under street lights!!), or the child is not interested in mechanical study and eventually becomes a school dropout. From there the story continues on the lines of how the student managed money for education; what he did for living; how he made right decisions; how he made use of opportunities and how, in the end, he became a successful person.

Ever since I was a kid, I used to listen to such stories and feel motivated. A story a day will make sure that I don’t keep my books away! I still go agape when I imagine the struggle in dreadful circumstances that these great men have gone through in their lives, to come out as a highly respected successful individual.

Let’s look at some examples. Ramanujan lacked the basics for living, Bill gates was a school dropout, Steve Jobs was a college dropout, Narayana Murthy was once struck by poverty, Dhirubai Ambani started reliance with Rs.15000, Lakshmi mittal was poor and a part of unmanageable huge family, Rajini kanth was a bus conductor, and our own ARR... needs no introduction.

All these stories were inspiring alright; but every person who becomes successful has this kind of story behind his/her achievement. And normally, we all are awestruck by it!!

This is where some serious questions run into my head. Do they all lead to a stereotype “successful people had to win some very hard battles in their lives”? All stories have the same base which is one or more than one of the list - poverty, lack of good education or education in bad monetary conditions,” striving to live” years, and other equally grave conditions. At a level, this really irks me. Such stories have literally stopped motivating me for the simple fact that I too am going through an important phase that’s going to decide my life and want to be successful! And if only hardships at younger age can bring light to the great future, then I don’t see any bright light glittering at even the farthest point I can see from here.

I never had formidable monetary problems. Education was bad but I am not a school dropout. I am not struggling for food or shelter and I have my own room with lot of space. I have taken numerous bad decisions in my life. I have carelessly overlooked many opportunities. And now I am sitting and writing this post wondering what the theory is behind big achievements because we have never heard (or at least I have never heard) of a successful man who was far from poverty with almost comfortable school life. Such people have always been a tiny dot and financially, either well-situated or troubled; more often the latter. How so ironical!

I do understand that success (in whatever form) cannot be achieved if we do not fight for it, and that you can never get to the top overnight on a smooth ride. But now I am saturated with identical “success stories” that I cannot endure another one of them starting from tortured childhood to terrific adulthood.

Miles to go!!

God Bless

Monday, February 23, 2009

Back to blog because of Rehman!!



I should say that I was too busy to blog all these days and even decided that I will not until something good happens to me. But now, even though no good has happened to me yet, I am feeling extremely happy that A.R.Rehman has created history…. and that has made me post in this almost deserted blog.

Slumdog Millionaire bagged 8 oscars for which makes me feel very good and the fact that ARR has bagged “2” makes me feel even better!! Apparently, a major population of India is happy and some, say like Amitabh Bachan, would keep it down at a level and say “yeah ok.. u got Oscar.. very good.. congratulations.. bye”.

Following the release of this film, we heard various comments about why one should not watch this movie. This is how I would like to respond to all those comments which started from Amitabh Bachan.

“The movie shows India in Bad Light. Movies that show India in bright lights deserve more recognition.”

Very correct. The movie definitely shows the dark sides of Mumbai. But what do you mean by movies that show India in bright light? Bollywood movies are competing with each other in “skin showing department”. All the directors and producers are busy finding girls would expose to the maximum for money. Tamil movie directors are interested only in commercial success (except for Mani Ratnam). Malyalam movies have no luck. Kannada movies have bad actors. Telugu movies… oh please. So people who make that comment, first tell me which film shows India in bright light and then speak about slumdog millionaire. I think that’s a comment that has no base.

“Why should we let a westerner make a movie in India that only shows India in bad light”

I read this comment in some news channel’s website; I don’t remember which one, though. But think about it, it’s not difficult to create a slum in London and finish the movie there (it would have only cost them a little more money). But beyond all that, there have been so many movies that has displayed India’s poverty, slums etc etc… but nobody questions those. We all sit and watch the film and say..”wah, it is an inspiring movie”.

It’s true that this film has won all its recognition only because a westerner has directed it. So what? If an Indian had directed this film, it would have been completely in Hindi and by releasing it abroad, he would have targeted only the Indians living over there. So obviously, it would not have got recognition. And if this movie had to go as an official entry for “foreign film” category in Oscars, our politicians would have made a mess out of it.

I am happy that now, because of danny boyle, an Indian film has won accolades and ARR’s talents have been recognized completely.

“By displaying the Indian slums (or western stereotypes about India) deliberately, Danny Boyle has attempted to make it appeal to the western audience and thus win awards”

So do you mean that we should not show on the screens, the western stereotypes about India? I don’t care whether Danny had a big plan or not. You like to watch all bollywood top stars and their hot air on screen rite? So the director gives you that. Probably that’s what even Danny did. If people in the west think India is all about poverty, then you make an impressive movie to disprove it. The movie shows only “whatever is there” in India. So if that bothers you so much, then stop carping and do something about the stereotype. Change the way India is. Make a difference (like what I am trying to!!).

There have been so many other comments as well and I think the negative reaction to this movie started only because Amitabh started it. He started it, his fans propagated it. Sometimes I am forced to think that the whole bollywood is “J” and that’s probably why there have been a lot of negative reactions.

Bollywood film makers, please stop begging girls to expose on screen and make sensible movies.

People, who don’t want to watch the film coz of the bloody blah blah, please get back to your senses and watch it like a movie.

ARR, you rock man!! You are THE GENIUS.